


Afraid

by McKei



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Fanfiction, M/M, My First AO3 Post
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:14:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26300221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McKei/pseuds/McKei
Summary: This is just an ordinary story. Nothing special, nothing new. Just a plain story of two boys meeting. However, will their story bring joy or pain? That's the question.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Kudos: 6





	1. MINHO

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a fan fiction. It doesn't represent the lives of the names in the story in real life. Any events that happened or seems familiar to such experiences of the reader is entirely coincidental. Read with caution.

Some said fate can't be contradicted. Fate is something that is meant to happen. It is already written. But what if someone challenges their fate? What will happen? Will it go smoothly or will it go to a really rough path that everything will be in ruins? No one knows. Yet _some_ believes. 

**CHAPTER ONE:**

We're on the treehouse, a secret base only for us. We've been secretly meeting here, away from the judging eyes of many. Away from unnecessary talks and chatters, away from hurtful words.

"What will happen to us?" 

He said as I laid my back to his chest, looking at the snow-white clouds passing through the clear sky. The wind blew on my face. I giggled. 

He brushed my hair to release his nervousness. I looked at him with my round eyes, pouting. "Hm. Nothing." I said. "The war is already over. There's nothing to be afraid of." He looked at me with worry. Then, he put his arms around me, hugging me. 

"I know it's over. But I'm still scared." He said.

"Oh, what a scaredy-cat." I stood up chuckling, brushing off the dirt on my beige shorts. "You know, there's nothing bad that's gonna happen to us anymore." I said facing him, now sitting on a frog-like position. I poked his nose and smiled. "We're together now, okay? Nothing bad is gonna happen to us anymore."

He smiled back to me, seemingly assured. "Thanks, Adrian."

**6:27 A.M**

I woke up again, three minutes ahead of my alarm clock. This was the third time this happened to me. I found it confusing because normally, my alarm clock would blare first then my mom would come dashing to my bedroom door and knock since it's been five minutes since it rang. 

"Odd." I whispered.

"Thanks, Adrian."

That again. Same dream. Same person. Same smile. 

I do not know this person and I don't have any memories of being with him. And I'm not even... Oh, never mind. Plus, my name's not even Adrian. 

"Ugh." I rubbed my face out of confusion. "It's just a dream, idiot. Why would you even think about this dream? It's just a dream."

Meow. My cat looked at me with the same confusion as me. 

"Come here, girl." I said reaching for my cat which then purred as I do it. 

"Odd, right?" 

"Minho, I know you're already awake. Your clock is not blaring as hell. Come down here. Breakfast is ready!" I heard my mom's voice. "All right, all right! Coming." I said back. 

I fixed my bed and head out for breakfast. My cat was following me, brushing her body on my feet. I saw my mom stirring some coffee for me. "Oh, dear. Come. Let's eat."

I saw eggs and sausages and bread and rice. Plenty of food for us.

"Oh, how plenty. Is there a party?" I said jokingly.

"Shut up and eat." She said. 

"How serious." I whispered. 

I don't know why this is just normal for us on the first day of school, then the following days, it's just oatmeal. I really don't know why. 

I then saw my little brother come out from his room, dragging his elephant stuffed toy on the floor. He looked at me with his sleepy eyes.

"What?" I asked, chomping down the egg sandwich I made.

"You're ugly this morning." He said yawning. 

I just rolled my eyes on him and messed his hair up and continued eating. 

I ate quietly and took all that I can. I then prepared for school and head off. This is my first day as a senior and I know that a lot of things and, for sure, problems will happen this year. I don't know. Just... 

I smiled as I breathed the slightly cold air of this morning. I walked uphill towards the school and I saw some students gathering and talking about what happened to them in summer break. 

One person stood out, though. He's walking with his earphones plugged in his ears and ignored people. Transferee? New student? Hm? 

"Thanks, Adrian."

That scene on my dream flashed again. Oh, this is making me confused! I don't want my life to be in a f***ing drama like those on the screens nowadays. Oh, lord. Oh, whatever. But I say, this year is gonna be fun. 

I continued to walk up and saw my friend waiting for me at the school gate. 

"Oh, what a turtle." Felix said in his surprisingly low voice. I got confused.

"Who the f*** are you?" I said chuckling. 

His voice was not like this before. It was way higher than that. And don't question me if we didn't communicate. We just chatted and not called or meet last summer since he went back to his country and stayed there for the rest of the break. So, clearly, I have no idea. 

"So what happened to your voice? Have you swallowed the depth of Mariana's Trench?" I spoke laughing. 

"Oh, whatever." He said.

"It suits you, though." I said smiling

He seemed to be flustered by this because he put his hands on his neck. 

He just rolled his eyes. 

"Where's Hyunjin?" I asked him. 

"Oh, where do you think?" He replied at me sarcastically. 

Of course, I know where. 

We then went into the school. The school is not that special. It has rooms, restrooms, a canteen, a gym, and a field for open activities. I find this normal for a school in the province. 

Felix and I continued to walk towards our building. This is the only room for seniors since we're the only block for it. 

"Oh, I know where he is." I said to Felix in a lazy tone. This always happens before we go to the room. Hyunjin waits for Felix and me at the entrance of our building then a large number of girls rounded him. 

Hyunjin laughed at the girls he's talking to, not to mention a few boys. I heard the screaming as well as the chattering of the group as we near him. Oh, what a jerk. Does he know that he's not that handsome? I'm more handsome than he is, but why do girls, and boys, of course, get crazy when they see him? Is he a magician or something? 

Well, of course, that's only a joke. I know enough that he's so handsome. And he's also super kind to anyone so I bet, his handsomeness is not just his factor.

"Hey, ugly. Let's go." I said loud enough for his fans to hear. 

"I'm not ugly!" He said sulking. 

"Oh, whatever." I teased him smiling. "Let's go."

As we started to walk towards our room, I noticed him again. That boy with earphones. He seemed familiar. Everything went in slow motion. I know this sounded cliché, but that's what happened. Everything slowed down as I looked at him. And then our eyes met. There I saw in his eyes one thing.

Loneliness. 


	2. CHAN

I'm always alone. Why? Because this makes me better. This made me stronger, strong enough to handle pain. Emotional pain. Some people judged me for always being alone. Well, who doesn't, right? It seemed that people find judging a hobby. Well, their judgments don't hurt me anymore. They just don't matter to me. A little, probably. 

**CHAPTER TWO:**

"Be strong, Chris. Be brave. It's okay to cry if you really can't handle it, but please, Chris. Please be strong." Her tears cascaded down as she said those words. Her hand that once caressed my cheek fell lifelessly. 

"Please wake up. Don't leave me, please. Don't..." I said, shaking. I saw lights dimmed in her eyes. I can't. I can't handle this pain. I can't... 

Everything went black. It went to nothingness. Where am I? Is this death? 

Slowly, I saw a small flicker of light.

"Hi, Chris." A voice said. 

I looked at the light and it formed to a woman. To _her._

"Hi, Mom." I smiled at her. Tears dropped at my cheeks. "It seemed that we're together again, right?" I giggled as she came slowly towards me. 

"No, Chris. You're such a young one to join me again. You haven't even met you someone yet, have you? Why are you hurrying?" She asked me, kneeling so that I don't look up to her. 

She wiped down my tears and said, "Chris, please, please be brave."

My brows furrowed in confusion. "Why do you always say that to me, Mom? I'm brave! I can handle anything!" My tiny voice echoed, filling the nothingness. 

Worry seemed to appear in her eyes as she heard that. She then stood up and patted my head as she always did. "Remember that I love you, all right?" She said to me smiling. "I will always love you."

She kissed my forehead, looked back, and walked forward. 

I'm confounded by this. 

"Mom? Where are you going? Mom!" I shouted at her as panic ran through my system because she's slowly getting away from me. "No... Don't leave me, Mom! Don't..."

My tears couldn't hold itself, they continued to flow like an endless stream. I dropped down to my knees, reaching out to her as her light slowly flickered out. 

Everything went to darkness. To complete nothingness.

I then heard a faint voice. 

"Your son suffered from heart snapping. Because of this, he can't tolerate extreme emotional pain anymore. His heart won't be able to handle it. It could literally snap if ever he experiences this kind of thing. His heart will be totally broken." A man in white said to my dad. "He's so young to experience this so please be cautious. He should not experience any more extreme trauma." The man paused. "The operation seemed to be successful, however, we still need to monitor his condition. Worst comes to worst, he may not recover from this and he may undergo lifetime medication. Excuse us." The man said and went out of the room. 

My dad stood there, speechless. No word escaped from his mouth. He just stared at the door where the doctor went out. 

"Dad?" I said as loudly as I can. He turned in shock. It looked like he was so tired. "Where's Mom?" I asked him. 

Then, everything flashed to my eyes. Her tears, her hand on my cheeks. Realizing the situation, tears started to form on my eyes. I started to feel pain in my heart. 

"Dad, it hurts. It hurts here." I pointed at my chest. "Dad... Where's Mom, Dad? Dad..." Tears flowed down my cheeks as I asked those questions. I don't know how to explain this pain. I'm feeling it again. 

My dad immediately went towards me and hugged me. 

"I'm here, Chris. Okay? I'm here."

I just cried. This pain... Can you please stop?

**6:27 a.m.**

My eyes opened with tears. I was crying again. 

It's been seven years since she passed away. It seems that I haven't moved on since then. Seven years... 

Two years after, I decided to move away from my father to distance myself from him and from everyone. He disagreed with me at first, but I insisted to be independent so that I can handle myself. He continued to support me financially, though, and I thanked him for that. However, it just sat there on the bank since I don't really use it. 

"New school again, huh?" I whispered to myself as I gathered my strength to get up from the bed. 

I left my previous school because I started to get close to the people there and it's not good for my condition. 

I suffered from heart snapping. A rare disease wherein the heart will literally snap when someone experiences extreme emotional pain or distress. About 1 in 10,000 people suffer from it and can be treated with an operation. However, it seemed that I didn't actually get treated. I still suffer from it. 

Complete emptiness welcomed me as I walked out of my room. I always question myself, what will it feel like if my mom was still here? Will she cook me breakfast? Will my dad and I joke at one another? Sadness once again came to my face. I then breathed deeply to calm myself. 

I prepared myself to go to school. It's just a few walks away from where I'm staying. I plugged in my earphones and went ahead. 

I haven't explored the place yet. However, judging the vibes of it, it seems that this place will help me stay completely calm.

As I walked towards the campus, I distanced myself to people. Getting closer to the school gates, I noticed someone looking at me. I just ignored him and went ahead.

I had already prepared myself for this day, scheduling, the rooms where I'm going to, as well as the teachers and classmates that I will be with this year. 

As I walked closer to the room, I'd felt a warm sensation. I noticed him again. The boy who was looking at me at the gates. He looked at me as if he went through my soul.   
With this, my heart suddenly fluttered. This is bad. This is really bad. 

Why can't people leave me alone?


	3. MINHO

I saw it in his eyes. Loneliness. I felt that he's been experiencing pain, emptiness. This bothered me. Why would such a young boy experience such things? But I questioned myself. What do I know? I just saw him. I don't even know his name. Should I care?

**CHAPTER THREE:**

It seemed that he was startled. But right after, he just continued to walk inside and find a spot at the far corner part of the room. He did not remove his earphones and just stared outside the window. He seemed to not want to be bothered. 

"Hey, Minho. Where do you wanna sit? We don't have permanent seats yet." Felix said, looking at the empty seats in the room. 

"Oh, anywhere would be fine." I smiled at him. 

Hyunjin then went over to the opposite corner where the new student sat. 

"Hey, guys! Let's just sit here." He said, loud enough for us to hear. 

I continued to walk towards Hyunjin and hid my curiosity to the new boy. He really seemed familiar, though. 

Few minutes passed and the homeroom teacher arrived. She then introduced herself. A few moments later...

"All right, we have a transfer student here." The teacher said. 

The boy seemed nervous. I could tell from his face. He looked like he shielded himself so much that he doesn't want to face any people. 

"Why don't you come here and introduce yourself?" She said, smiling at the boy.

"Can I just introduce myself here? I'm not comfortable speaking in front." The boy said straightforwardly. 

The teacher seemed surprised by this. 

"All right. It's fine." The teacher stuttered at first but then continued with a warm tone. I noticed that she was surprised by the attitude of the boy. 

The boy stood up and looked at us, "I'm Chris. Nice to meet you all." He said and sat down again. 

"It looks like he doesn't mean it." Hyunjin whispered to me. 

Our eyes met again. And there it was. I saw loneliness once more. 

I was getting irritated because I shouldn't feel this and I shouldn't care because he's just new. Plus, we're not even close. Yet.

The classes went off fast. All that happened was orientation. The three of us, Felix, Hyunjin, and I, left the room. As we walked away from our building, I noticed that my wallet's gone missing. 

"Oh, wait. Have you noticed my wallet?" I asked the two. 

They both shook their heads. 

"Maybe you left it in the room?" Hyunjin said.

"Maybe. Wait for me here. I'll go upstairs."  
I said to them. Preparing myself, I threw my bag first to Felix and ran. I didn't bother to look back but he was shocked by this. 

As I hastily went inside the room, I was surprised when I bumped into someone and I 3fell down to the floor. 

"Ow. Sorry." I said before looking up to whom I bumped into. 

I looked up and saw him. It's him. The man in my dreams several days ago. I can feel his warm presence. But no. It's impossible. I shook my head in response and looked back again. It's a different person. It's Chris with his blank expression.

Before I could say a word, he spoke first.   
"Lsaook where you're going." He said with no emotions and proceeded walking down the hallway. 

I was startled. Of course, it's my fault because I'm just running and didn't think if there's a person there or not, but I expected him to at least acknowledge my apology. But no, he just replied coldly and walked. It left me speechless. 

A few moments later, I was back to myself again and went to my desk. My wallet was not there. I checked my drawer if it's there, but it' still missing. 

I tried to run to ask him if he noticed my wallet, but as I walk down the hallway, I twisted my right ankle.

What a day. This day went smoothly and then this. I thought to myself. As I focused on massaging my ankle, I saw some feet walking towards me. 

"Does it hurt?" A voice asked and hands went to my ankle and pressed it. He knelt. 

I looked up to see who it was. Again. It's him. Why was he doing this? He's cold a while ago, then he went like this now? Ugh. 

"It's better if we go to the clinic now before it closes." He said to me, still pressing my ankle. "Can you climb on my back?" He asked before he looked at me. 

His eyes looked like he's really concerned. It's not like the eyes glanced at this whole day. 

I heard him clear his throat which made me come back to reality. 

"Uh, I can walk." I stammered. I gathered up my strength to stand up, however, pain went through my ankle and I dropped to the ground again. 

He smirked. I saw him smirk. This is the first time I've seen him have an expression since this morning. 

"Come on, climb on my back. The clinic's closing." He said turning his back on me. 

I didn't move because I was confounded. 

He looked back at me and said, "Don't look at me like that. Just climb." He said again, now back on his emotionless tone. This made me decide to get on his back. "I'm asking you nicely at first. You seem to like that kind of tone." He said, still sounding cold but I thought there's a bit of chuckle with it. 

I then climbed on his back, still feeling the pain on my ankle. I grunted. He first looked at me but faced the hallway again. 

He walked down the stairs. The clinic's a bit far from our building so this will take a bit long. Walking, I noticed that I was near his neck. The smell of his sweat and his perfume mixed as it lingered on my nose. He actually smelled fresh, a complete opposite of what his aura emitted. 

"Don't smell me. I'm sweaty." He said straightforwardly, not bothering to look back at me. 

"I'm not." I said, trying my best not to stutter. 

As we neared the clinic, I remembered that my friends were waiting for me. I don't know where they were, but they had my bag. My lost wallet also came to my mind. I started to panic. 

"I found your wallet. I forgot to give it to you earlier." He said as he continued to walk. This made me a bit calm. At least, he found what I came to the room for. 

We went inside the clinic and I saw the school nurse just preparing to leave. She then saw us. 

A few moments later, she fixed my ankle, applied some ointment as well as a bandage to it. I said to Chris that I'm all right and it's okay for him to go, but he didn't leave me and stayed until everything was over. 

I felt flustered. 

What the heck am I doing? Why am I like this? And it's the first day of school! Am I attracted to him? What the f***?


End file.
